Being an Adult - FAIL

So after driving over to Sarah’s house to mooch off her Internet to download the new version of Mac os 10.5 so I can download iTunes so I can sync my new phone so I can function like a normal human being once again and continue to be a positive member of society, I decided to write a quick little blog because let’s be honest I’m probably not going to fix my internet this week. Oh, you didn’t know my awesome new internet is already broken.... keep up readers. Evidently if my dog’s penis isn’t bleeding it’s my internet committing suicide just to piss me off.

So besides the not having the internet, I also don’t have cable. Right now I’m sitting at Sarah’s bar in her kitchen watching The Bachelor. I’ve seen all of 14 minutes of this show and well, readers it turns out I’m not a complete because those bitches are CRAZY.

Look at me functioning in the real world...

I’m not on a TV dating show fake writing vows for a fake wedding even before he fake proposes.
In stead of drinking 7 days in a row, I’m sipping on water. (Mom and Dad be proud)


However things happen where I feel like I’m taking three steps back...

I’m super pissed off about not being able to use my NetFlix on my wii right now to finish watching the first season of Sons Of Anarchy. I’m completely having with draw symptoms from not being able to lust over a greasy biker dude selling some guns. What is wrong with me?

I’m 27 years old and bought brand new bedding from a real adult store that didn’t start with “Tar” and end in “get” only to forget to buy new sheets. Green duvet cover with aqua sheets are being rocked on my bed right now...

Oh, not to go back to the fact that I’m watching this crazy train wreck of a TV show I’m watching, but some chick named Courtney just said how scared she is to get close to the fugly bachelor dude because she’s been hurt by guys and doesn’t trust men. Chick please! You are not special. You are not interesting. You are nothing exciting. You are not an individual snowflake. I hate when girls make dumb commits like this. Obviously you have been hurt and don’t trust dudes. You know how I know that... you’re fucking single!!! Seriously, show me a single girl that doesn’t think this. Show me a single girl who hasn’t been hurt or creeped out or “betrayed” by men and I'll show you a big fat liar.

2 hours later...

I think I'm SOL. My computer is so old I can't update to the new version of Mac OS which means I can't download the new version iTunes which means I can't sync my new phone which means I no music on the new phone.

I fail at being an adult...